I am married to a wonderful man, but of course not a perfect one. He’s kind, thoughtful, and funny.  He will take time to run wiring and move an antenna on the roof just because I mentioned that I would like XM radio in the kitchen.  On the other hand he’s not good at listening to me, forgets to tell me important things and leaves his socks and clothes on the floor.  I decided I can focus on the clothes on the floor or I can focus on the radio.  No matter who I am married to there will be things I like and don’t like about that person and so I focus on the things I like.  Of course it helps that he is a great person who is not abusive in any way, unless you consider bad jokes abusive.